First off, don't marry her or become common law.  Your income will be considered in repayment or interest relief.

Secondly, 1%?!?!  HAHAHHAHA Prime+1% maybe?

If you say 6% rate that's $555/month for 10 years.

Basically the 6% calculated at $555 for 10 years.  I think it's sitting at 6.5% right now for CSL but it could vary. 

Just download an amortize program and you can play with the amount of debt, payment and interest rates.

To me, your biggest issue is joint income.  No one wants to avoid getting married for financial reasons but, if you can't make the payments within 6 months of her graduating, you may not want to get married if it stops her from applying for interest relief (until you can afford to start paying it back).

BarryW2 ....

Not to try to confuse "Sutibu" intentionally here in any way, but I thought that, from what I know and what I have read on this website, spousal income is not factored into the equation. Or is that "rule" only applicable when a person is applying for Interest Relief and not after a Student Loan defaults, etc. ? Perhaps Mark or Johnny can clarify this.

If that is the case that during the Interest Relief periods that spousal income is a fudge factor in determining eligibility for Interest Relief, then that to me is a double standard considering that once Student Loans are defaulted for example and collection agencies come after you, the spouse is not obligated to have his or her income go towards the debt because the Student Loans were incurred before marriage and thus the spouse is not responsible.

That to me is one of the bright loopholes that I hope is never shut down - that a spouse is forced to pick up the slack. Of course the day that happens, that will destroy one of the most important institutions in our society: marriage.

Here's a little tip though ..... there is nothing wrong with living common law, unless of course your religious convictions are strict such that you don't believe in living together until marriage, because until there is a marriage carved in stone in the form of public records and a marriage license then the fact you and your spouse are living together is "need to know" information that you don't have to give out. To cover your tracks when living together when someone phones, then when you are the one at home don't answer the phone and let an answering machine kick in and thus not having the Student Loan guys questioning who you are.

If you're okay with living common law, then that gives you and your spouse the perfect middle ground to have a close relationship and keeps your spouse's interest relief coming in.

"kevmetric" ....

The above statement is uncalled for and unnecessary here. We are supposed to debate things and ask questions here. We are NOT here to give people poor advice like what you gave to "sutibu". I find what you say insulting and degrading to "sutibu" because I have a girlfriend who knows about my $65,000.00 Student Loan debt and it does not bother her one bit. She loves me for me and does not judge me in any way, shape, or form. "sutibu", assuming your girlfriend is a good woman who treats you right and loves you for you then that's all that matters. It is this kind of attitude and mentality from "kevmetric" that results in so many relationships in all stages including marriage to fail. So "sutibu", don't get discouraged by this remark.

Me and my girlfriend don't care about luxuries and we don't care if we ever own a home and are relegated to renting an apartment. Me and her both know that the Student Loans are an achilles heel and we are not letting that stop us from being a happy couple and building a relationship every day.

"sutibu", what I would do as a precaution as your relationship with your girlfriend grows stronger everyday is (applicable if you plan to live together common law, etc.) is to make sure that both of your names are not on rental agreements, one of you has all mail and correspondence directed to a family address, and file your income tax  returns separately and indicate you are single. Like I said before, if you ever decide to live common law, that is need to know information.

I do apologize on behalf of all of us here where we seem to assume you were going to marry her and stuff. As for me, I was providing my two cents on the advice of BarryW2 so that way you can arm yourself with the knowledge you need in case your relationship gets very serious. Also, as soon as I seen this post again today and saw this poor advice from "kevmetric" I had to place a strong rebuttal against that.

Trust me, there are ways around some things (ie. loopholes) as long as need to know information is just that exactly and that is what this web site is all about: is getting the right advice. I don't know everything myself and I learn new things everyday and I often come here with questions of my own. However, this website is not meant to be a place where someone like "kevmetrc" tells someone else to ditch a boyfriend/girlfriend. That is very inappropriate.

Definitely do not let a debt influence romance.  That would really be surrendering to the absurdity and unfairness of the system.  Assessing spousal income is in effect a form of indentureship and is repulsive and barbaric.

One option would be after she qualifies for interest relief is for the both of you to go abroad and teach English as a second language.  It would be like an extended foreign tour and you would be able to live well enough and pay off a significant chunk of the principal, if not all of it, with both of you contributing.  It might take a couple of years.  Make sure you apply for interest relief before you leave the country though.  

I agree with Mersan .....

As far as I am concerned, the likes of Dr. Laura do not have the slightest clue what we as ordinary folks have to experience and endure everyday. Also, people like that, including BarryW2 and kevmetric have a perception (no offense) that a person's net worth dictates who have the happiest and most successful relationships.

Like I said before, because I am in debt of over $65,000.00, I find that attitude extremely selfish and narrow-minded because that tells others who are in debt and trying to get ahead that we are not worthy of someone's love. I have been rejected before on a couple of occasions because I am so far in debt and in between jobs, etc., and I tell ya it makes someone feel small and worthless.

No offense to anyone out there who measures someone's worthiness based on net worth, but it takes a hell of a lot more than financial stability to have a happy relationship. While financial stability is a goal we all work towards sooner or later, you cannot allow a perceived lack of financial stability in a person stop you from missing out on finding the "right one" or allowing a relationship to end on those grounds.

Interesting thread here !!!

Finances and love..........lovely little mix........both parties have to agree what gets paid every month.....unless it is a this is your bills... and these are my bills.........and I will tell you that.... it does not work......So you are in it together.... OR you are not !!!! 

I have a little question for you.  Have you looked into what the combined income for interest relief is ??? It is hard to speculate what it will be like two years from now.... but it will be a little guide for you, you may be fretting for no reason.  You can get interest relief for quite some time......and then there is debt reduction. (BUT GOOD LUCK ON ALL THIS)

Living common-law and saying that you DO......does have it's benefits you know.... when it comes to income tax time.  Especially if one party is having a hard time finding a job.  You can use your spouse as a deduction and transfer school tuition and eligible months to your spouse.  For the majority of people who are in school and are not employed... these deductions are of absolutely no benefit......BUT to the working spouse they are.

Next little thing that I would like to share with you is that if your spouse is coming out owing  $50,000..... she will be looking for a job unless of course there is pregnacy involved......My advice would be is to make sure that this does not happen!!!!  I am not against having kids.....got two beautiful little darlings.........BUT school, debt, and newborn babies, and finding JOBS just doesn't mix well.... when you only have six months to find a good paying job before it all kicks in.

WEll anyways......now we have you married....with kids and $50,000 in debt and climbing   WElcome to your life !!!!

So if there is anyway that you can make this debt not climb to 50K than I would suggest doing that.  Could she be working part-time right now to help contribute to her cost ???  That would be my personal recommendation.  The less money you receive........the less you have to pay back.  It can be a DEBT SENTENCE for life.

Talking from experience

KEVMETRIC .....

The last thing we need here in these forums is too much pessimism which is what you are throwing around here. No offense, but we don't need it.

A lot of things can change by the time we as Generation X reach the retirement age because I anticipate long before that time arrives that the Student Loan system is going to collapse onto itself for example.

I may have a $65,000.00 bounty on my head in the form of Student Loans in collections, but that is not going to stop me from living a decent life. When I get onto a good paying job, I may not be able to get a home (more likely my girlfriend will be able to because her credit is good) and stuff, but I will be certainly saving up for retirement, etc. After I pay for my rent/mortgage, utilities, food, clothing, dental, RRSP, etc., whatever is left over will go towards the Student Loans.

To be quite honest with you, I don't care if I can't and won't make the "required" student loan payments if it is going to cause my standard of living to slip below adequate levels. My well being and a decent standard of living comes first and should be the reward for working a good paying job at the end of the day and I will not be forced into poverty by my Student Loans. If the government wants to start a war with me, bring it on because I will pull all the stops to go public about it.

The problem with people like Dr. Laura and KEVMETRIC is that you are all brainwashed to believe in this material world non-sense and thinking that the only people worthy of a loving relationship involving marriage and kids are the ones who have very high paying jobs and/or have a net worth which is a positive number and not a negative number and/or have excellent credit ratings. That's the problem with our society and it is getting worse everyday: we live in a material world and material things are not the most important things. The things that don't have a pricetag, the intangible things, are the most important things to me. As for me and the wonderful woman I found, that's all that matters.

KEVMETRIC, and anyone else that places a post here and saying what you're saying, people like me and SUTIBU are going to take great offense to these remarks because it makes us feel worthless and undeserving of the finer aspects of life such as marriage and a family.

To conclude, could KEVMETRIC and the like please lay off of people like me and especially SUTIBU who has been caught in the middle of all of this pessimism??? If we are going to say anything to SUTIBU, we need to be providing encouragement, the right advice, and being positive. Assuming that SUTIBU's girlfriend is a good hearted woman who is mature, responsible, and has the best of intentions, then that's all that matters. From my girlfriend's perspective, that's all that matters to her too.

In the material world that we live in, if we let a person's net worth dictate things first and foremost then we are giving into the evils that are created by such a world.

The thread gets another boost........

Love the handle........deathbullet......unfortunately for some of us it is.  Nobody wishes you any ill will...... neither one of you.  It is just that some of us ARE abit older......like in the 30's and have come to realize the errors.... and the other side that is not all fuzzy and warm.

These were not necessarily all our own errors........ but life happens.

I only wish that I had information like this site provides.... when I was 21......because that is the age that I got into this whole mess.  Had I known then what I know now..... things would have been way different.  The world was new.... I was excited....... and so ill-informed ....... misguided into the world of debt.  It will take many years to pay off the debt that I incurred the first time around in school........possibly a lifetime.

Your biggest asset could be coming across this site.  It certainly gives you food for thought.....

I will point out a few things.... because I simply can't help myself.

1.  Everybody has a taxing course load........Anyone that is serious about their education..... and wants a 4.0 GPA will tell you how stressful it is........ADD two kids to that........ and a part-time job  and it gets even more stressful.  IT CAN BE DONE......... and I would suggest that you do..... You are young.......you could do it if you put your mind to it.....even with a full-course load.

PLEASE NOTE: I did this the second time around...........and don't owe a penny in loans for it....yep I even survived... and am better for it.... and was still able to keep a 4.0 GPA and graduate at the top of my class.

Having said that....... I wish you well in your employment next summer....but even a part-time job between now and then would really help.

Next point is:  Nobody sets out to become an expense on their spouse.  The point that I was making above was that should that type of circumstance happen.... it is helpful for a spouse to use you as a deduction.  SO once you start making an income... and start seeing that the tax man gets his share...... remember that deductions are a good thing !!!

Next point....... (I am almost done)

When I went to college, I knew I was getting into massive debt and I planned on not marrying until I had it paid off.

SO this means........ you will owe at least $31,000......... lets pretend for a minute that you will not have to pay any interest for 5 years.

Let's also believe that you will be making at least $2000+/month and that you will be able to pay aprox. $500 per month to your student loans.....you are looking at 62 months.....dishing out $500/month..... So you will be about 22 on graduation.....plus 5 years to pay loan before you will get married.... that is not too bad and probably smart.

BUT........if you can only pay $250/month (which would put you in default like the majority of us)---now the interest will accrue at an alarming rate because you will not be eligible for interest relief and such.  This will triple that time period and you are looking at 15 years or more.......CRIPES......you will be a spinster.

YOU might want to rethink that one.  This debt probably will follow you into marriage.........or a common law relationship..... It is reality.

That said, I think I/we'll be perfectly fine when it all comes down to the crunch.

Just keep this totally positive attitude and I am sure that you will. 

 Just forgive those of us around here that have had the self-esteem drained from our soul.......from the life sucking student loans.... we never for one moment thought that this could happen.  It sure knocks one into reality when they wake up....and realize we do not have a job like they promised our credentials would provide us.

REALLY .... I DO WISH YOU THE BEST....... so don't take this the wrong way.

Glad you came by.... stick around... we love no better than to hear success stories..... that's part of what this site is about.

When your boyfriend posted "DEBT OF DOOM"  he wasn't that far off.

Welcome to the hand-to-mouth club......deathbullet.

Not to many fed with silver spoons around here........ hence the student loans...... We all have had our trials in life.... and if their happens to be anybody out there that didn't before student loans they sure in the hell have them now.....

From now on I'll think of you as the magicbullet....anyhow welcome.

I have to agree with Deathbullet:

Kevmetric, what were you thinking about?  Having a close relationship is worth it's weight in gold, and certainly reduces the stress and increases the satisfaction of life for people lucky enough to find them.

Suggesting that we dump people who get themselves in student loan debt is short sighted, unfair, and applies to US PERSONALLY!!!

People have often pointed out on this site that it is not a personal failing to fall into the student loan trap ..... so why should Subitu see "the girlfriend" in that light, and ditch her?

I was a little offended when I read that post, and I'm not even involved in this situation!

Definitely do not let a debt influence romance.  That would really be surrendering to the absurdity and unfairness of the system.  Assessing spousal income is in effect a form of indentureship and is repulsive and barbaric.

One option would be after she qualifies for interest relief is for the both of you to go abroad and teach English as a second language.  It would be like an extended foreign tour and you would be able to live well enough and pay off a significant chunk of the principal, if not all of it, with both of you contributing.  It might take a couple of years.  Make sure you apply for interest relief before you leave the country though. 

Mersan good advice.. Just what this forum needs!

Kevmetric... whats with negativity.. I dont remember you ever being that way!

John.. Miss ya brother.

deathbullet,

I can tell by your posts your a fighter..good on you.. stay focused, plan and be prepared.

You will be fine

Troy

Troy,

You are harder to find than Jimmy Hoffa. Where ya been?

Call me sometime this afternoon if you are around. I tried to reach you yesterday to no avail.

Johnny

http://www.cfwgroup.ca - www.cfwgroup.ca

http://www.cfwgroup.ca/forum - www.cfwgroup.ca/forum

I got this reply from Kevmetric in my email. It appears to have since been deleted by the system administrators, presumably due to the use of the term "shut your cornhole" or something:

"Forum: Urgent Help Needed?
Topic: My Girlfriend’s Debt of Doom
Posted By: kevmetric

Ahhhhhhhhh.....the idealism of youth. Fantasy.
The enthusiasm of inexperience, cluelessness,
and the hope and joy that stems from lack of
direct knowledge of how things work.

Stick a finger up your cornhole, and do the
same for your girlfriend. Tell me if you can
sense a difference among the two. Indeed,
the divorce rate has been even at 50% over
the past 30 years, only for the fact that when
1 of the 2 in the marriage drops the ball on
the ability to generate income, the relationship
often is poised.

I often recall a childhood memory, of a good friend
of mine, good fellow, who was raised in a broken
home. The Mom has a STD, perhaps from the husband
visiting prostitution houses from time to time,or
like many teenagers these days showing an epidemic
of VD, promiscuity. He got laid off way back when
from a security guard job, and fake a robbery
on his own house, to raise cash for rent, and for
the household expenses, as far my opinion went
of the circumstances. I don't think he collected
on the home insurance, because ... they're too smart
for those tricks. The couple had terrible fights,
to the point of all kitchen dishes, and glasses
getting smashed to the floor, to pieces, screams
filling the entire apartment complex.

I have to credit my friend for living through
all that turmoil, and surviving in school,
and not turning to crime. He would search the help
wanted ads, at the age of 11 years ...and he would
get turned down for being about 5 years too young
to work. I guess he felt he needed to do something
for his parents.

In the last recession, in 1993, even kids were
working in small shops in malls, to make the family
survive when the breadwinner would lose his job.

I have to agree...the top 1% of USA and Canada,
mostly those running companies, those who are
directors on the company boards, and CEO's
are robbing the bank, so to speak, and the working
class are getting shafted more and more, from
China displaced manufacturing jobs."

Sucks how things turned out for your friend, but...what exactly does any of that rant have to do with the current discussion? As for the naiveness factor, neither one of us is foolish enough to believe without question that things will work out. We know its uncertain. All relationships are. That's just common sense.

OK

KEVMETRIC ........ this has gone too far. This email to SUTIBU is highly offensive not to mention harassing. SUTIBU, have you filed a complaint with the email service provider of which this email originated from? If not, I would do so immediately.

For the Administrator here, along with the overwhelming majority of us here on this website including Johnny, I wish to propose a motion to have KEVMETRIC and any other potential aliases on this forum permanently removed from here. His behavior and attitude leaves something to be desired for I have found many of his remarks to be very offensive as well.

So KEVMETRIC, I have one thing to say in conclusion: Govern Yourself Accordingly as you REALLY stepped over the line this time and did potentially irreversible damage to yourself from a legal standpoint.

No no no, you misunderstood! >.<

I have my account configured to email me every time there's an update to the topic. He posts, I get an email copy of what he posts. I'm saying that after I got my email copy it appears the original was removed from the forum, presumably for violating some conduct policy. Its not that I'm mad or anything. I just hate censoring things.

Mark ...

I for one am grateful for the website you have going here. It is sad to say how people like KEVMETRIC are taking this site for granted and saying negative, discouraging, derogatory, or offensive remarks at those of us who participate in the forum. You most certainly deserve a lot of gratitude because you have donated a lot of your time and it shows your passion for wanting a better system for all of us who have been victimized by the past and current inefficient and barbaric bureaucracy running our country. What you are doing has taken a lot of time and energy and what you have created here makes a lot of difference for people like me. Keep up the great work!

SUTIBU .... sorry for the misinterpretation there on how that message got delivered to you. LOL The point being of course that these remarks are terrible and uncalled for. It was bad enough that KEVMETRIC's previous remarks to discourage you was bending the rules, but for him to make that remark that resulted in deletion from the forum (as Mark just said) was definitely crossing the line. It is bad enough the government gets away with things such as stereotyping and labelling us student loan debtors the way they have because they think that they are gods and stuff, but at the very least we can certainly do our part to make sure that people like KEVMETRIC are kept out of these forums.

I've been following this thread....and biting my tongue for the longest time...all I can say regarding kevmetric is... IT'S ABOUT FRIGGEN TIME!!!!!!!!   

 KEVMETRIC...YOU'VE BEEN NOTHING BUT DISCOURAGING FROM DAY ONE...

MARK...THANK YOU GREATLY!!!!!  BEHIND YA 100% FRIEND!!!

KWELMM .....

Couldn't have said it better myself!    

We certainly do not need discouraging people in these threads because discouraging people can sometimes unfortunately cause people to make a poor decision or two. That is why we need to have people here willing to help each other out with sharing our stories and correct and unbiased information. We also need to have people here who are inspirational and willing to take a lead. Certainly I have done anything I possibly could and so has others: Too many names to mention here.    

Blue_Thunder,

Right-O!!!  LOL

Have found you to be most helpful...and look forward to what you have to say to others on here and on cfw site!!!

(Sorry to get off topic, Mark!)

KWELMM ..... SUTIBU:

To add a footnote to the appalling nature to the negative comments I have read in this post, on a personal level I know what it is like to have my personal circumstances interfere with what should be a healthy relationship.

In 2003, I had met in cyberspace a woman who I thought was nice and genuine and only to discover her "dark side" when it was too late. I moved to her area for a change of pace to try something different only to go back to my hometown feeling hurt and dejected. Once she got a grasp on the scope of my huge debt load and seen that my luck getting meaningful employment was not improving despite diligent efforts to gain a job, we ended up not spending as much time together and even spoke little on the phone with every passing day. It was like she was making me do time until I were to gain meaningful employment.

She of course later admitted, which I began to see anyways, to having high standards of the wrong kind. She didn't seem to care about all the non-material things I had to offer her which I think are among the many wonderful things that makes me who I am. All that mattered to her was finding a man with so-called financial stability already established. Also, rather than support me and encourage me, she would be putting me down and made me feel small and worthless. There was no such thing as patience when it came to me getting a job. It was "NOW! NOW! NOW!" thing. I was under enough personal pressure as it was to gain employment and certainly did not need this added pressure.

At that moment, and for more than a full year until I met my present sweetie last August, I was so turned off from romantic relationships because I felt convinced that unless I was gainfully employed and getting my credit back on track, I would never be able to attract a woman to me. While for years everyone close to me has thought of me as bright, intelligent, good looking, and having a big heart, at that time I was faced with a discouraged feeling of being undesirable because I am not financially established despite strong efforts to change this for myself. From that point onwards, I managed a few dates and a couple of very short relationships that failed before really getting started. However, that all changed for me last August.

For me, it took being in the right place and time to have found a woman who my heart told me to take a chance on despite being hurt and rejected in the past. Since last August, I have been with a wonderful woman who is very beautiful and intelligent in all the best ways possible. Until that time, I thought there was no one out there for me unless I was rich and established. She truly sees me for what is inside my heart and soul and knows I want to find my purpose in life in terms of a career at the first available opportunity.

She is there for me when I am down and out and when my luck is not great at times and not shunning me and putting me down. I for one now believe there is someone for everyone out there. Anyone who wants to think that money and material wealth is everything in life and is what makes people and their romantic relationships happy are gravely mistaken. For most of us who are responsible and mature, we all know that financial stability is a realistic goal and like anything else in life requires patience to achieve. However, a so-called lack of financial stability in the present time should not impede a blossoming relationship. Financial stability is only one cog in the machine and many other cogs are of equal or greater importance.

Because of this, I found the remarks of KEVMETRIC very offensive and uncalled for.

SUTIBU ....

I could not agree more that KEVMETRIC is gone!     

Sutibu...this is a culminative thing really. It's not that Kevmetric posted one -- I hate to say offensive, but perhaps over the line? -- post...He's never been helpful or supportive to anybody, and only ever demonstrated distain for all the members here. However, he was merely cold at the beginning, but lately, when he did post, it was nasty and cruel.  It's been a slippery slope...

I actually was starting to wonder about his mental state because not only was he getting more and more nasty, but his responses made less and less sense. He was reading stuff into posts that just weren't there...including this one, but there are other threads.

Good move, Mark. You don't need the headache and he contributed nothing positive to this site.

Poly

I have been absent from this forum for a while due to it lack of consistant moderation.. I am not implying that mark does not do a good job on the contrary. He is a great man with a giant heart and for that I thank him.

I strongly believe that once any community reaches population such as the size of this one a greater force of moderation is needed. In order for this forum to continue growing in a positive fashion there must be some additional policing to keep the negative forces at bay.

And yes I have heard the argument that we are all highly educated, mature and responsible adults..

Troy

I

Obviously you have done a wonderful job Mark and you deserve mucho thanks.  I do think though that if it were possible to relive the last year then this site would be a very different place had it not been graced with the negative presence of Java/ Islander and his squadron of merry aliases.  Islander has one objective and that is to destroy any possibility that student loan borrowers have to address the unfairness of the system and seek some kind of resolution.  That is why he keeps returning. Islander and his many personalities want all discourse and attention to be directed at him (them). 

I agree with Troy in that since student loans and their various problems affect millions of people, decisions about them should not be made by any one individual but rather should be decided by a larger community.  Ideally, there should be some kind of a board that should set posting criteria and there should be moderators on the forum to take care of problem posters such as Islander. Hopefully, when you decide you’ve had enough that you will consider handing the forum over to a committee rather than simply shutting it down.   

Thank you  Mersan.

That was exactly what I was trying to convey..

Troy

Well....well....well.........I'd be interested to know just how many accounts were assigned back at the end of 2003...early 2004... that Islander has....and just how many threads that he has had on-going conversations with himself....starting up newbie accounts just so that he can keep himself going.

ISLANDER :

I've said it before and I will say it again.... Islander just how many aliases do you have ?  Sometimes when I come to the site I wonder if a few of us... are simply just conversing with Islander??

I know that you are reading Islander and keeping track of the chaos that you bring to this site.  You have made some great posts...really you have, and I am sure that many have actually benefited from some of the posts that you have made........but really this is not how one makes friends.  I often flick off the computer and walk away.... feeling sorry for you..... I can only hope that things will get better for you..... Are you on drugs ??? Or do you need some buddy??? I am not sure what to make of you....REALLY.  You often just simply freak me out !!! 

How do you keep it all together ??? Do you have a flow chart of all the personas.....We ALL KNOW THAT THIS IS NOT THE END of you Islander....Try to be a little more subtle though.....Cripes !!!  We all need a life line.... a sense of belonging..... if you want to be on this site.... you cannot be so overbearing/crude.  What has caused you so.... much disdain in your life ?  TRY GETTING REAL.....Everyone else is forthcoming with "their" story and why they are bitter....

We are all trying to work through it in our own way.... and help others if we can along the way.... KNOWLEDGE IS POWERFUL

The only thing I can think of is..........YOU are one of THEM.....You draw me in everytime.......I read your posts... say oh yah... good point and then continue reading and have to shake my head in disbelief in what you are posting..... YO....YO....YO....YO

MARK:

SORRY.....you know that their are some of us that simply cannot resist responding to ISLANDER..... We don't always know that it is him.

I know .... that I often thank you for this site.....you have to know how many people you have provided with valueable information to get help ...... or.... with the mental anguish that the world of student loans cause..... THIS SITE MAKES A DIFFERENCE.  The people who post on a regular basis make a DIFFERENCE.

I can understand that it must consume a lot of you time.... when I haven't been on in awhile and try to go back and read some of the posts made it takes a very long time..... I don't know how you can do it alone.  The guys are right....some help may be in order.  DON'T shut down the site because of ISLANDER though.... he would only win.  "THEY"  would win.....

IF...imagine for a minute that everyone that you have helped along the way gave you a pat on the back right now.... your back would be broken !!!!!

OR... if we all gave you a hug.... we would quite possibly choke you..

Take care.... all of you.... who are real out there.

I know this is an old thread, but I was reading through and can't help myself!

I find it admirable that "deathbullet" has such high expectations of herself and her ability to pay back her student loan debt all on her own.  I, too, had those same lofty expectations!

I went back to unversity after a few years out of high school, but floundered for a while (big mistake from a financial point!).  Finally, I set my sights on an engineering degree.  I completed my degree with $50,000+ in debt!  I was bound and bent that this was MY debt that I would be paying back on my own.

I must give you some more information here.  While in university, I met a FINE fellow who was taking a trade (great program--I recommend trades to ANYONE).  We decided we would get married 20 days after my last final exam of my final year of engineering (good times, good times!). 

While taking premarital counselling, the topic of money came up.  We had spoke about money MANY, MANY times and it was no secret how much debt I had coming out of school.  My soon-to-be husband, however, had only 1 small student loan on his plate!  During one particular session, the student loan discussion came up and I stated my belief that this was MY debt and I had NO expectaion of him paying it back.  Well, I needed to get over that and accept the fact that we were about to take on all the ups and downs life threw our way, student loan debt included!

It was very humbling for me to accept his willingness to tackle the debt together.

So, let me jump to after graduation, after the wedding....I COULDN'T FIND A JOB!!!!!!!!!!!!!  It was crazy!  I would seek out my profs to help hook me up with contacts, only have it pointed out that "you are one of our best, YOU shouldn't have a problem finding a job!"  (thanks for the words of encouragement, but it doesn't put money in the bank!)

So, student loans came due in November and I applied for interest relief until things got better.  I still had no job and was going to all sorts of crazy places for interviews.

Christmas was fast approaching and my new husband was heading back for his last session of his apprencticeship.  When he went back, there was going to be ZERO money coming in (he was working under contract & not eligible for EI), unless I got a job! 

11th hour sort of thing--I got a job offer the day before Christmas to start the first day in January! (praise God!)  Also, my husband had sent in an application for grant money through the government and he got the maximum he knew of anyone he had met throughout his apprenticeship (again, praise God!).  Now, one would immediately think that things were all rosie...BUT, my offer was so low, I cried my eyes out.  I was making MORE as a student when I did the internship program!

To make a really long story a bit shorter, my point is this...as determined as I was to pay back my student loans on my own, I simply would NEVER have been able to!  My first job would have had to paid double what I was offered, but I was really in no position to negotiate THAT much!).  As it is now, we are living within our means, but we had to make some pretty significant cutbacks (I call that realization in our past, "budget cuts").  I could have NEVER have done it on my own!  THAT, my friends is one of the "beauties" of student loans--try to "better" yourself, only to be put in a position where you can't rely on yourself to pay it back!

deathbullet,

A little something someone told me.....

It is all mind over matter.... if you don't mind...it doesn't matter.